Satirical News: No Direction Member DILG Secretary Doraemar Roxas Becomes Tang Endorser!

For the world of Filipino entertainment, apparently the trend of No Direction has taken a whole new meaning of endorsement.  After Doraemar Roxas had gone through his multiple campaigns as traffic enforcer, painter, laborer, tricycle driver, a samurai... now he has become a cover guy for Tang juice drink.  President Nobita had appointed and willed that since he won't get another term, it would be best interest for the Nobita Liberal Party to make Doraemar Roxas the next President of the Philippines.  The new propaganda of the Nobita Liberal Party to get their votes is simple... to become brand endorsers!

When asked on an interview why he decided to endorse Tang, Doraemar Roxas said, "Well that's what my fourth dimension pocket has brought to me this time as a solution for the Nobita Liberal Party.  President Nobita had ran out of ideas for my succession since the Philippine law disallows him to sit for a second term.  We decided it was for the best interest of the nation that President Nobita will step down because Damulag's Army is getting aggressive.  However, peace talks with China were made when President Nobita invited the Chinese Embassy for some Tang Juice at the Malacanang Palace which also included Damulag's Army.  Also, during the screening of Rurouni Kenshin: Kyoto Inferno, the three cast members Takeru Sato, Emi Takei and Munetaka Aoki also had some Tang.  The Tang juice is representative of Filipino goodwill.  After all, everywhere you go, Kraft forms a joint venture in every country they go to."

During the Tang endorsement, Doraemar Roxas was accompanied by his wife Korina Sanchez-Roxas who wanted to make sure her husband was in good shape.  He decided to wear a formal business suit to endorse Tang as not only a drink for the masses but it tastes so good that it can also be for political gatherings.  The tagline for Doraemar Roxas for the Philippines is, "Drinking Tang... it's more Fun in the Philippines."  The No Direction band also promises to serve Tang as part of the Christmas Concert this coming December.  Kill Henares has also declared those who will buy Tang products endorsed by Doraemar Roxas may use them as deductibles.

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