Satirical News: ABiaS-CBN Reacts to GMA-7, Creates Pinoy Rider!


ABiaS-CBN had heard that GMA-7 had planned to show Kamen Rider OOO.  Rather than pick up any Kamen Rider series that was not shown, they have planned to do their own personal project.  Now they have bragged that Filipinos will now have their very own Kamen Rider which they called as the Pinoy Rider.  Pinoy Rider will be a project by President Nobita's sister, Kris and it will have the support of the production crew of Juan Dela Cruz.

Daniel Padilla who is currently 19 years old is set to play as the main character Emilio Henares.  The story of Pinoy Rider revolves around a 19 year old young man who lives in Tondo, Manila.  One day he is chosen by a babaylan to be acted by Anne Curtis to become Pinoy Rider.  In this series, Pinoy Rider must battle the evil forces of Filipino-Chinese mogul named Sean Kang.  Sean Kang is the owner of a new television called the Sean TV which is responsible for airing Japanese, Chinese and Korean shows.  Worse, Sean Kang the main antagonist of the show has volunteered to help promote Otaku culture and destroy Pinoy Pride.  To save Pinoy Pride, Pinoy Rider was born to fight the Sean TV Corporation before it destroys Pinoy Pride.

To show the spirit of the Filipino, Pinoy Rider will have its use of Pinoy style equipment.  Rather tha ride the traditional Kamen Rider motorcycle or as of late Drive uses a car, Pinoy Rider is shown to be riding a Jeepney to save people.  Pinoy Rider will also use equipment like bolo, spear and other indigenous weapons to promote Pinoys are the best.  Other stuff related to Pinoy Rider shows him as a man who has great love for the Philippines.  A sneak preview shows him with the tagline, "It's More Fun in the Philippines!"

Dindo Perez the head writer of Juan Dela Cruz which lasted for 188 episodes has said, "If GMA-7 can show Zaido, we can now create our very own Kamen Rider called Pinoy Rider.  Here we are going to show Kamen Rider OOO that we Filipinos are the greatest on Earth.  Every other race doesn't matter!  Certainly Pinoy Rider will show the world how great we Pinoys are."  With him are writers Shugo Praico and John Joseph Tuazon as assigned sub-writers who are assigned with Pinoy Rider's writing.

Kris Aquino had expressed what Pinoy Rider will be and she has expressed her excitement that her son Bimby Aquino Yap will be part of the show.  "I can't wait to have my son Bimby in Pinoy Rider.  You better watch out GMA, Pinoy Rider will knock out Kamen Rider OOO.  We will have our series shown by November 3, 2014.  It will be the most phenomenal thing ever!  You watch out GMA-7, we ABiaS-CBN will crush you down!"

However at Toei Ltd., one can see Toei's current CEO Tyuyoshi Okada simply laughed his head off.  He said, "If I denied GMA-7 any more rights to make any more Toku because of how horrible Zaido is, Pinoy Rider I assure you will be a real joke.  Even Haim Saban's failed Masked Rider may look decent compared to it."  Haim Saban who was renewing his contract for Power Rangers only said, "I don't think Pinoy Rider will ever get Toei's blessing compared to Power Rangers."

Comments

  1. I expected that his powers include emitting black fart, which is symbolic of smoke belchers, and self-destruction, which pokes fun at the Failipinos notion of "resourcefulness" where they would still be proud of it even if they're already using throwaway items and especially if it is already dangerous to one's health and the environment. :P

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