Satirical News: Bum Aquino Spanked in Singapore!

Bum Aquino insisted on promoting data caps during a telecommunications conference in Singapore.  Although he was given the chance to step down from the stage, he continued to insist that data caps will help fair use policy in Singapore.  It was reported that he went to Singapore to find out how to improve the Philippines' rather slow Internet.  Instead, he was shown to have been attempting to promote data caps to Singapore's Internet Service Providers much to the ire of the Singaporean government.

After the Telecommunications Conference, Bum Aquino was caught acting like a baby and rolling on the floor shouting, "Data caps rock!  Data caps rock!"  The police caught Bum Aquino and brought him to Changi Prison to lock him up inside a juvenile cell (where minors who break the law are locked up, in his case pre-teenage lawbreakers) for a a week for his misbehavior.  The verdict came in how to deal with Bum Aquino's public scandal.

They very paddle that was used on Bum Aquino's ass!

The Singaporean Court decided that Bum Aquino should be spanked in public by a pre-school teacher instead of a police officer, while he wore a grown-up size version of a pre-school uniform.  He was asked to get into spanking position and a spanking paddle was used to strike his bottom up to five times.  The school teacher assigned was told to wear a Ninja Turtles mask while carrying out Bum's punishment.  The reason why a school teacher was assigned to carry out Bum's punishment was because he was too childish to be spanked by a police officer.  Caning was considered too heavy for his offense considering he has not destroyed any public property either.

Bum Aquino was requested by the Singaporean Government to leave and never return until his political term is over.  Meanwhile protests from Migraine International can be seen while he was chastised by the Singaporean government.