Satirical News: Korina Sanchez-Roxas Threatens To Kill Herself If She Doesn't Become The First Lady!

As the May 9 Elections arrive, it's finally clear as day that Mar Roxas needs to cheat to win. But with his low ratings, it seems that there's been another alternative. After several failed attempts by Roxas to win the first slot without cheating, his wife Korina Sanchez-Roxas now gives her most stupid solution yet.

"If you don't vote for my husband, I'll kill myself!" said Korina trying to induce guilt to the people. She has said that they should be grateful all Roxas did for the country such as the call center industry saying that during Gloria's term, Gloria had no contribution whatsoever to it. She said life will be better under Roxas but nobody takes her husband seriously.

What was last seen was that Korina herself had prepared a .44 calibur magnum pistol in hopes that her death will allow Mar to win. She said, "I don't see why my death will not let Mar win. Leni's getting the lead because of Jesse's death, Nobita won because of his mother Cory's death and Cory won because of Ninoy's death. I believe my death will make Mar the president of the Philippines."

Details on whether or not Korina will commit suicide will still follow. Stay tuned.


  1. Oh please, I'd rather have both of them dead.....


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