Better To Have Loved And Lost Than To Have Never Loved At All?

It's been six years since one of the girls that I liked behind my closet tied the knot. I would dare say it's been a four-year denial that I didn't want to fight for -- perhaps it's my greatest regret. But again, we were just teenagers when I had that crush on her for those four straight years. Yes, she was the woman that I wanted to marry and I admit, while she was short and didn't have much of a sexy body -- she was quite a beauty if you ask me! But I always had to abide by the "no interbreeding" policy which just SUCKS. If I'm to talk she's prettier than that crazy high school fling I've had.

What I thought about that four-year denial was this -- why wasn't I honest with my feelings for her? I was having my painful high school crush rejection who wasn't really pretty compared to her. If anything, I thought about how I used to tease her a lot to throw my frustrations at her yet she always repaid most of it with kindness -- except if she's had enough and decided to yell like Belle did to Beast. Yup, it was really something that got me to like her aside from her good looks.

I could really think of how my lust for her consumed me. It was a lust I refused to admit yet I always thought of making her my wife one way or another for her beauty. I felt the burn of passion that Lotor had for Allura in Lion Voltron or Golion. I felt every night I had was consumed with thoughts of making her mine because she was so pretty. Though, her character, not her beauty, was what stood out more. I guess her inner beauty made her look prettier than she really is. The thought of making her mine still lingered on even in college when I saw other prettier girls. It ended to the point that I asked her to marry me when we were teenagers. All she gave was a slap refusing to become my wife. 

Years later, the romantic feeling just died down. I met her several times and we ended up just having friendly interactions. I still had a lingering feeling towards her until the day she was finally taken. It was sad to finally let her go -- but it was better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.