Satirical News: Habitually Tardy Pinoy Filipo D. Hippo Loses Case Against Lucio Tan!


The case of Filipo D. Hippo vs. Philippine Airlines' Chief Executive Officer Lucio Tan has now Raged after a few months of pending since more cases had to be answered.  Senator Judge Miriam Defensor Santiago Served as the Presiding Judge of the case to Hippo's case against Tan. Atty. Antonio Tinio attended to the case of Hippo believing that it was a case of severe and purposely done misinformation but was terrified at the look of Senator Judge Santiago who began a rather short trial. Tan was defended by one of his lawyers who chose to remain anonymous.

As part of the case opened by Atty. Tinio in Hippo's behalf, Tan was accused of providing misinformation that caused the plaintiff to miss his flight.  Hippo was shown to be crying and telling Senator Judge Santiago that he was lied to by Philippine Airlines about the schedule.  He also stated his statement, "I am never late, time will wait for me." to justify why he showed up one hour late to the trial which only caused Senator Judge Santiago to call him "GAGO!" and slammed the gavel to begin the trial.

While the trial was held, members of Commission of Human Rights, Migraine International, Bobo Muna, Anak ng Bobo (Akbobo) Gagabriela and Anak Patis were rallying outside to support Hippo. The former chairperson Etta Rosales said, "As you see, scolding people for being late is a violation of human rights and not respecting Filipino time is a violation of human rights." Toady Casino and Gary Martinez were also identified. Martinez spoke in Tagalog saying," This is oppression at its finest, that PAL left Filipo D . Hippo. I would say that because Lucio Tan was born in Fujian, China he can never be considered a Filipino. Never forget the deaths of Elizabeth Batain, Ramon Credo, Sally Villanueva and Flor Contemplacion. I am so happy of all the explosions that happened in China to kill those accursed Chinese. May that sinkhole swallow all of China to avenge Filipo."

In a ruthless "Game of Tans" as it would be called, Tan himself remained calm in the face of opposition. One of his operators at PAL had prepared solid evidence against Hippo, showing the exact booking date to Boracay. The security revealed through security cameras that Hippo had indeed arrived late in the airport and the plane to Boracay already left. With all the evidences mounted against Hippo, Atty. Tinio tried to defend his client but it was all lost. With a statement of "Atty. Tinio, you are dead wrong." and declared Tan the winner.

Unwilling to accept his loss, Atty. Tinio then said, "That's your opinion." straight to the judge's face. Senator Judge Miriam unable to keep her cool, placed her glasses on the bench and said, "No that's my ruling pal and let me tell you something. You are already of age and you are still acting like a baby in the courtroom. Consider yourself admonished! You and Hippo are cited for contempt and will be detained here for two nights."

As for Tan, he had won the case against Hippo. Senator Judge Santiago ordered Hippo to pay a total penalty of PHP 21,150.00 to Tan.  Angry, Hippo once again said it was a violation of human rights. To teach him a lesson, Senator Judge Santiago ordered Hippo to be detained in the courtroom for at least two nights, to be served only with improperly cooked mongo beans and overcooked buwad for their two nights stay. Hippo raised his objection demanding a five star meal and he was given additional two more nights. They will be forced to listen to Senator Judge Miriam's tirades for their time in detention. Hippo and Tinio were quickly transferred to their detention cells where they will be taught an important lesson.

It was made a rule that they will be forbidden from taking any interviews until prior court notice. A restraining order was given to both Hippo and Tinio that will prevent them from ever speaking in the media until further notice.

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