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Gracie Dzienny Picture For December 29, 2017

She's really looking naturally pretty here this winter. 

Satirical News: Light A Firecracker Against Duterte Movement Failed Due To Defective Firecrackers

What would have been the most glorious event in history turned into an event of monumental failure. The "Light a Firecracker Against Duterte" movement failed for this reason - the firecrackers that arrived for the attendees to use were proven defective. The first move was Cynthia Patay's attempt to blow up Yellow Cab in EDSA. They soon found out that the firecrackers were defective at that point. Others tried to use more firecrackers only to realize that all of them were defective. Leah Navarro's attempt to blow up stores that sold Lea Salonga-Chien's records instead of hers also ended in failure due to defective firecrackers. Worse, one could see Kris Aquino, Agot Isidro and Korina Sanchez-Roxas crying like toddlers when they discovered all the firecrackers were defective. It turned out to be that Atty. Persida V. Rueda-Acosta, PNP Chief Roland "Bato" Dela Rosa and Justice Secretary Aguirre set things beforehand. The precaution was to wet all t...

Satirical News: Jim Paredes Says President Duterte Will Fall By December 31, 2017

Former APO Hiking Society member Jim Paredes who organized the " Light a Firecracker Against Duterte " movement is now confident that he will win. He was last seen with Congressman Gary Alejano and Senator Antonio Trollanes as they prepare to finally overthrow President Duterte with firecrackers. "I am confident that this Light a Firecracker movement will succeed where Light a Fire Movement failed. This will be the end of the tyrannical Duterte Regime. We will restore democracy through this Light a Firecracker Movement. We will not obey the permits and we will not limit to EDSA  but we will conquer everything with firecrackers. We already have proof from the International Criminal Court and Agnes Callamard that President Duterte is a killer!" said Paredes as he was interviewed by Pia Ranada-Robles. Members of the upcoming Light a Firecracker Movement have shown up. One could see Kris Aquino, Leah Navarro, Korina Sanchez-Roxas, Agot Isidro and Cynthia Patay...

Satirical News: President Duterte Prepares EDSA As #TindigPilipinas Only Firecracker Area

President Rodrigo R. Duterte prepared a new Christmas gift which the Dilawans can take advantage of. This new decision happened after hearing Jim Paredes' threat to light a firecracker against him  and Leah Navarro's complaint about not having firecrackers. "If they want to have firecrackers then fine. I only banned firecrackers in residences but not in public designated areas. I give EDSA as a #TindigPilipinas only exclusive area where they can play with firecrackers all they want without police supervision. They can have all their freedom there and I will tie the area around with a yellow ribbon to specify their designation. That's where they can enjoy having firecrackers without police supervision and my repressive policy." said President Duterte during his Christmas morning interview. The new decision was respected and President Duterte sent men to tie EDSA Avenue with yellow ribbons. He called it a #TindigPilipinas exclusive area where they can play wit...

Satirical News: Leah Navarro Complains That Christmas And New Year Is Not Complete Without Firecrackers

Leah Navarro finally spoke about how the firecracker control policy has destroyed Philippine democracy. She recently posted on social media where she said, "It's an upsetting thing how the firecracker ban was implemented. During Noynoy's time, we could celebrate with firecrackers. Now we've lost that freedom. Filipinos can never celebrate both Christmas and New Year without firecrackers. Worse, it has to be supervised by the police in designated areas. Where's all the fun if you can't have firecrackers in your house?" The post by Navarro met an ire among Filipinos who have had enough of firecracker injuries. Many have cited how the firecracker can has allowed people to celebrate Christmas and New Year better. Among the many tweets raised up against her are the issues on firecracker-related injuries, people who want to get a good rest on Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve, houses burning down, how people can't concentrate on whatever tasks they ar...

Satirical News: Agnes Callamard Says There Is No Proof Firecrackers Are A Health Hazard

Agnes Callamard is no stranger to controversy such as when she said that there is no evidence shabu leads to violent behavior. After she decided to help Maria Isabel Lopez get her license back  she now decides to help Marbobo Roxas and Jim Paredes . This time, she said that there is no proof that firecrackers are a health hazard. "It's clear that President Duterte is a tyrant. Whether it's his war on shabu which has no harm on the brain, now I want to present clear proof that firecrackers aren't a health hazard. No, Filipinos should be allowed to celebrate with firecrackers. The smog in India that happened during Diwali wasn't even a health hazard. President Duterte should drop his firecracker control policy or face charges at the International Criminal Court." said Callamard in an interview at Crappler with Maria Ressa. Unfortunately for Callamard, more Filipinos who are fed up with firecracker injuries decided to attack her widely on social media. He...

Satirical News: Marbobo Roxas Encourages Filipinos To Defy President Duterte's Firecracker Control Policy

As Christmas Eve approaches, Marbobo Roxas makes headlines as he encourages Filipinos to defy President Rodrigo R. Duterte's firecracker control policy. He said, "It's really discouraging how I have not only been cheated out of my presidency but also, President Duterte is killing democracy by the firecracker control policy. I'm calling Filipinos to fight for their freedom by defying the law. This is a call to light firecrackers on our residence this Christmas and New Year." He was last seen meeting with Jim Paredes. It was reported that Paredes earlier launched a movement called " Light a Firecracker Against Duterte " in a bid to restore democracy. Paredes mentioned, "Would have Mar been president, this firecracker ban would have not existed. We will fight for our rights to celebrate Paskong Pinoy and Pinoy Bagong Taon. Banning firecrackers from our residences is a human rights violation. You must join Mar or lose your freedom to celebrate with f...